Just As i Am...


Since everyone is out of town... and i've got a physics test to avoid studying for... i thought i'd go ahead and complete Caroline's Tag. ugh... i'm not tagging everyone. We really have to start using protection with these damn things. Everyone's blog is getting hit up with this nasty infection!!!

1. First time you got kissed: oh geez. it was December 5th, 1990. and i only remember that because it was the same day that my mom found out she was pregnant with my brother. and right after my "boyfriend" kissed me... he kissed my friend Tiffany. i was confused. menage a trois is a hard thing for a fifth grader to grasp...

2. First time you drove a car: when i started driver's ed. i guess. i'm boring. and my parents were pretty straight laced. i remember sucking at it and my first day of in car lessons, i hit a dog! yup!

3. First time you scrapbooked: depends on what "scrappin' means. The first time i glued pictures down on paper was in kindergarten. then my senior year i did a small album. and then when i got married and went all Martha Stewart... i decided to pick up the actual hobby to complete a book about my trip to NYC in 2001. and now... this! (oh, the answer is the Spring of 2002, i think...)

4. First time you went on a date: this is sad because i've only been on a couple of REAL dates. but i was 19 and this guy Michael asked me out for "lunch." he picked me up, and surprised me with a picnic in the park. he brought chicken, salad and cheesecake and read to me. i was sooooo swept off my feet...

5. First time you fell in love: i always think i've fallen in love. but, i've only been TRULY in love once. and i don't care to talk about it again. and then i met my son... and i've been in love ever since. and that's all i need... if it never happens again for me with a man - he's all the man i'll need.

6. First time you cooked for someone: hmmmm. for a date? to be nice? or what? i cooked laken some eggs sunday morning. he had a horrible case of gas for the rest of the afternoon so... i guess it went down.

7. First time you got on a plane: I was 12. Where did you go? Were you scared? ummmm i went to Tulsa Oklahoma. i was flying buy myself. and now that i think of it, i always fly solo. with the exception of two flights i've always flown alone. so much for "come fly with me... let's fly let's fly away..."

8. First time you shaved your legs: omg! it was sometime when i was around 12. i used to have the hairiest (if that's a word) legs ever! and one time i was on the playground and one of the kids made fun of me because i was wearing a dress and pantyhose (damn parents) and my hair was all smooshed down... and he pointed and laughed and called me "Grizzly-elda" and i've been traumatized since. Not really! but i sat in the bathroom and did it with lotion, cause i didn't know any better, and my mom walked in and caught me. so i cut myself and then she gave me the "awwwww my little girl is growin' up speech" (this also happened when i got my monthly visitor for the very first time and actually thought i had pooped in my pants without knowing it. lmao. so gross and graphic. but she went to church that night and blurted out that i had "become a woman!" why do parents do this???)

9. First time you put on make up: i was in 8th grade. i was in christian school then so my mom only let me wear mascara so i didn't go to school lookin' like a little hooker. (that came later)

10. First time you moved out of your home: moved out? or got KICKED out? i was 18. it was on Thanksgiving Day. i got in a big fight with my mom and she said i should just leave since i did whatever the hell i wanted anyway. i didn't come back until last may. and now i'm out again.
i was independent for 8 years! TAKE TWO!!! (this time she didn't kick me out... but she did ask if she could keep laken.)


you have a light???

Ok. this is it.
my empty case of cigarettes. my last cigarette was yesterday morning.

i've quit.

i'm on day two now. and feel fine. i don't think i was ever really a smoker. i barely even smoked. but... i'm no longer able to afford it.

so there it is... the empty pack... to symbolize the empty lungs i will soon have!


this is an audio post - click to play

What you hear by clicking above...

hello? (testing microphone here...)
is this thing on?
it's chriseldaaaaaa
so, scott wants to hear if i have a texas accent
i'd like to say no. but... that's not true
cause i TOTALLY have a hick con'ry accent
um, hehe
anyway, i hope everybody's doing good
i love this audio bloggin' it's so much fun
so much faster than typing
i'm out of breath cause i'm out of shape (insert smokers cough/hack here)
and i'm a smoker
and i'm walking to school
my 2.5 miles that i have to walk between classes
so, i'm off to calculus
i'll talk to y'all later
gotta go
hope everybody has fun at CHA without me
create some trouble just for me
a little extra
gotta go

my cough actually stems from being sick this past week. i suppose the smoking doesn't help it much either, though. honestly, it's much more yucky sounding on this post than it is in real life. at least i'd hope so. And this my friends, is the way my brain works, notice how i didn't have a point. Not one single point. I don't know why my mind wanders around like that. It goes from one subject to the next and from completely out of nowhere! where did i come up with the walking subject? and being out of shape? wasn't i talking about my accent? and then CHA? i'm so confused. and if you are too... it's ok. i understand. trust me.

last night i was on the phone and was asked if i wanted some company. i said "no, cause i can't have milk. i'm lactose intolerant"

don't ask! cause i don't know what kind of glitch exists in the system that is my brain...


what are you looking at?

Ladies and gentleman... i have high speed internet!!! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahooooooo! I can't even begin to tell you how happy this makes me! I have been using dial up for about 8 months now. and the pictures were crappy, the connection was slow, the fact of the matter is... i hated it!

Soooo, i am happy to report that (despite the fact that we have yet to buy a fridge), we prioritized our needs and the internet came first. The cable for Jessica and internet for me. She doesn't use the computer... i don't watch TV.

I've been doing this whole "Photo of the Day" thing but i hate posting them all the time. and it's such a committment. So here are a few of my favorites. Sometimes i use my "photographic eye" and others i just take a picture. Never underestimate the value of a "snapshot." All of these were taken with my handy dandy Canon Powershot.

This has to be my favorite place on earth. when my brother was three we asked him what he thought Heaven would be like. He replied with "animals. lost of trees. .... Walmart!" my family is big on walmart! every sunday after church we would go to Wally World. i hate it. i always say that i feel like i need a flea dip every time i leave that place. I... am a Target Girl! But i hate that i can go in there for a can of baby formula and come out with $100+ of random unnecessary items!

My work schedule has changed. i work three nights a week at the electric company. you have an outage, i'm the girl you call to complain to. you can't understand your bill... here's my card. and it's boring. and drags on for.ev.er. these are my saving grace. i eat these things until my fingers swell from all the sodium intake. Eat. Spit. Be Happy. haha! great formula for life!

Remember me saying that i hate using restrooms that aren't handicapped? i was serious. if it's taken, i'll wait. i still think it's some sort of hypocrisy though because i scream at non-handicapped people who park in the "special spots." That and when a fully able-bodied person gets out of a firebird or mustang with that damn blue sticker hanging from their mirror and practically sprints into the store. ugh! but i use the large potty. i'm claustrophobic. that's where this stems from. and the only reason i don't feel bad about it is because it is generally the LAST stall. which means i walk further. not less. like the handicap spot thieves! look at all this space...

Speaking of phobias... have i mentioned that i have a phobia of running out of clothes hangers? seriously, it scares me when i'm doing laundry and start running low. i don't FOLD anything. my jeans are the exception. but socks, knickers, shorts... i just throw them in the drawer. everything else is on a hanger. when i'm doing laundry and i start running low, i will FLIP OUT! i stop and wait to go to target to re-stock. And, because i'm anal, i only use WHITE hangers in my closet. Laken has a little more variety. red, white and blue. but the red and blue are reserved (and grouped) for the clothes he has yet to grow into. sigh. i'm weird. but you still love me!

What's wrong with hole-y socks? they provide a nice, gentle breeze for my feet. keep me feeling oh so fresh. and they are perfect if i want to
toe somebody off!!

This is the Pad Thai i finally got to eat. i keep hearing people talk about it on their blogs. and Cathy Caroline is always eating something that i haven't realized i'm craving. and since the Thai Restaurant is right around the corner now...

This was me. frustrated. Talking to April on IM trying to figure out how to use Bloglines. it's supposed to make my life more simple. but all i got was a headache. i finally figured it out. but it took eons. and i'm sure april thought i was truthfully a bottle brunette. she was like "just hit suscribe." and i kept saying "what????"

don't worry. i only want to cut people open for a living. has nothing to do with technology.

and because we're moving. and we have no fridge. we can't cook. not that we would should we buy one. thank goodness laken drinks a powder and water mixture and eats from jars. i have more than likely added ten pounds to my ass this week. i used to go to the gym. and jessica works there. i really need to get back to this... i'll leave you with a little exercise humor! happy Monday!

P.S. Jocelyn... we are getting all A's this semester. the GPA gods came to me in a dream last night!!!


movin' on up...

so... this will be a long and picture loaded post because i took a shload of them this past weekend.

it was fairly exciting and makes me feel great! first of all, i guess i never mentioned that i was moving. So "I'm moving." I finally moved out of the parental units' home and got my own place. ok ok ok. i'm sharing with my friend Jessica. (and laken) We got a really nice three bedroom, two bath, and two car garage. Although it's been a nightmare from the moment we signed the lease.

For starters: there is no garage door opener. so i call the realtor and she gives me this "suck it up you big baby" attitude. says, "you can't lift it?" and i firmly replied that i shouldn't have to. for the amount of money i am paying for that place, i should be able to open the garage with a touch of a button. i told her it's a security issue to have to do that and i wasn't going to do that with my INFANT SON in the car while i close it, lock it from the inside (if it locked - but that's a WHOLE other issue), lock my utility door, then walk around through the house and leave through the front door while my son sits there waiting - all the while there is a bus stop right in front of my house? No Ma'am!!! so i told her that since my lease didn't LEGALLY begin until the 15th (we signed on the 13th) that i wanted her to hold off on depositing my checks because "unfortunately, that garage door is a deal breaker for me. I like the house and the location but i need to make sure that i find something that fits my needs. and opening and closing that two car door is not going to cut it. I would like for you to contact the owner by the close of the day and let me know if he can remedy this situation. i WILL NOT pay half of the cost either because i feel that it is something that can only improve the property and i have no intention or need to take it with me when i leave. I also feel that it is somewhat of false advertisement to have that garage and no practical use for it. I feel that it is something that should have been brought to our attention when we did the walk through of the house. but it wasn't." She was a bit rude to me. which is fine, because truth be told, i was rude to her. she says that she doesn't think it's a possibility to have it installed, but will ask anyway. then she points out that if i want a place with a garage opener that i will be paying more money. I said "well, there's a house eight houses down from you that is newer, cleaner, has new carpet, same amount of rooms and a garage door opener and it's the same cost. I have several appointments to see other properties today. so don't cash my check. get back to me with the owner's answer and we'll go from there."

ten minutes later... she calls back and says "he'll put the garage door opener in."

so, if you ever need anything. i'm the girl to call. because i'm a stubborn libra!

I had to work saturday night at the restaurant but spent the morning moving boxes and whatever furniture i could into the house. Afterward, i went to the grocery store and loaded up on cleaning supplies because this house looks like it was surfaced cleaned and i'm about to let my son crawl and touch EVERYTHING in it!!!!

and this, ladies and gentleman, is what $172.19 worth of cleaning supplies looks like. The lady at the cash stand said "Well, at least i know you ain't nasty."

work was awesome as always. i love my job. afterward i went to a house/Olive Garden Employee party with my new roomie. i only stayed for a bit because 1. i'm getting old and can't hang and 2. wanted to get home to my son before he woke up for his 1am feeding.

Here are my friends from work. I have ugly pony tail hair in all of these pics because, well, i had just gotten off of work.

This is my friend Rene and her husband, Dustin. She is super sweet and i love her and her love of Salsa. She just got this hottie haircut. too cute. We will all be going to Vegas in May together!! wooot wooot
Me and Jessica

Eric, Steve, and Blythe. Giving their "Longhorns" sign. It was so cute, they all posed but Blythe (obviously not a UT fan) says "you can do that" and then she struck the "sexy pose" as Eric later referred to it.

Blythe and Bree. Blythe thinks she has chinese eyes when she takes pictures. I think she's a skinny and beautiful bitch with great hair and needs to shut the hell up.

Adam, Jessica, and David. These three all went to high school together. It's a small world after all. Adam and David were both surprised that we knew each other. and even more surprised that it was because we went to CHRISTIAN SCHOOL together. I told them my halo was slippin...

Rene, Me, and Gina. The first OG girls to show up. I hate being sandwiched between pretty people.

Sunday started off with Church. it ended and i sat around and chit chatted with the pastor and then went back to get my purse and Bible when i realized that my purse was gone. Contents of purse: Wallet, Cell Phone, car keys, house keys, desk keys for work, my iTrip, and my iPod. this trips me out. so my pastor is helping me look for it. we are the last two people to leave. and nothing. NOTHING. my purse got jacked at church! (I swear things like this only happen to me) So i can't drive anywhere because i don't have keys. and no i don't have a spare. so i'm calling the Mother. nothing. argh! so my pastor has to drive me to Jessica's work. so embarrasing. turns out, one of the ladies accidentally picked it up. she brought it back to me, and even slipped $5 in the wallet because she felt so bad and wanted to give me gas money. How cute is that?? i spent the $5 on cigarettes.

Most of the stuff is in the house now. this is all of my stuff. most of my furniture stayed behind when i moved from San Antonio. So it's nice that jessica has everything i don't.

The ginormous living room complete with a fireplace and gawd-awful wood paneling. seriously, the decorator should have been shot.

the kitchen. missing a fridge. i hate being a grown up. now we have to buy a fridge. and NO those aren't boxes of alcohol. i always go to the liquor stores for boxes to pack up kitchen stuff because they are so thick.

the dining room with nasty wall paper. i wish you could actually get a close up of it. there are little leaves on the walls. Leaves and plates. yes! perfect combination. ugh. ( you like the laundry basket full of food?) The rest of that stuff is scrap supplies. i definitely need to organize that now that i have space.

my room. with my California King sized bed. oh how i've missed you bed! and you too my sweet little down comforter.

this will be laken's room. it's bare i know. there's so much involved in moving. everything is everywhere and i can't figure out where to effin' start...

my bathroom. once again. the wallpaper choice in here is horrific. but hey. i'm over it. it's doesn't match my light lavender motif. but i'm over it.

the rest of the house belongs to jessica. i figured there's nothing like violating your roommate's privacy by putting it on the internet. so... you're out of luck. but rest assured that it is equally disturbing and harmful to the eyes.

i took these pictures before we got my bedroom furniture and laken's crib over here. Jessica's storage unit had yet to vomit as well. so it looks better as time goes by. Just thought i would share a little piece of the independence that has made me sane again...


here ya go...

i am still very much alive! and kickin' too! this will be short because i'm at school. i promise to
update soon! but for now Happy Hump Day!!!

An 80 year old woman was arrested for shop lifting. When she went before the judge he asked her, "What did you steal?"

She replied: a can of peaches.

The judge asked her why she had stolen them and she replied that she was hungry.

The judge then asked her how many peaches were in the can. She replied 6. The judge then said, "I will give you 6 days in jail."

Before the judge could actually pronounce the punishment the woman's husband spoke up and asked the judge if he could say something.

He said, " What is it? "

The husband said "She also stole a can of peas."


nuh-uh... i was on BASE!

so i got tagged...

i thought i was safe! but apparently we were playing the "NO BASES" version of tag. Dammit!
just kidding Jocelyn!!! Even though you called me "Chrisrelda" and even though i don't know what the instructions are.... I'm assuming that i have to list four of each because of your explanation of what four is. i dunno. too early in the morning to be thinking...

Four Jobs i've had:
radio personality (or DJ as most call it)
billing rep for credit cards and electric companies
.... female impersonator

Four movies i'd watch over and over:
When Harry Met Sally
The Sweetest Thing (high five on the clean poo-nanie!)
Office Space

Four Places i've lived:
Dumas - pronounced "doo-mus." be nice.
San Antonio....
i suck. i've only lived in three cities. (if you want to call the first two "cities")

Four TV shows i love to watch:
Grey's Anatomy
American Idol
Grey's Anatomy
American Idol
i'm not a big TV watcher.

Four Websites i visit daily:
there's really only ONE that i check everyday and that's my email.
it takes me about 100 days to read all the blogs i read.
i don't really do the whole 2Ps thing too much anymore. burn out. and fast!

Four Places i've been on vacation:
and these are in the order of my favorite to least favorite.
Red River, NM
New York City
San Antonio (before i lived there)
and anywhere in Pennsylvania - i like colorado and LA too. but you said four...

Four foods i love:
Thai Food
Japanese Food (super cool in japanese)
chinese food
... i'm seeing a pattern here.
and i like Sonic. does that count as "Food" ???

Four places i'd rather be:
far away from my sorted and ready-to-be-washed laundry piles
published in a magazine somewhere
sitting in lecture - be it Physics, Calculus, Genetics or Microbiology...i'm just itching to get back to school (NEXT WEDNESDAY BABY!)
on my king sized bed...

Four people to tag:
(that will do it???) ok. here goes nothing!
Amy Hart, Nadine, Scott, and Island Girl Jen.... (sorry i didn't know your new last name)

back to laundry and cleaning and getting ready for my big move! woooot!


whatever i feel like i wanna do... GOSH!

love the new look.
just like to change things up a bit
can't change the fact that i just realized...
i love monochrome
i'm so morbid
but i love staying on the phone talking until the wee hours of morning
love new faces
new thoughts
new craziness
new takes on my craziness
love my friends (all two of you!) bwahahaa
love making spending money on saturday nights and blowing it by sunday morning
love cake and ice cream and chicken fried rice
oh man....
what the FRICK am i talking about???
ordered a new book today from Barnes and Noble
so i can partake (oooooh! big word for sunday morning)
in my "Book Club" with Scott
who sends me crazy emails about social work
and lets me try to explain my insanity
who loves that he is surrounded by scrappin' chicks
who promises to motivate me intellectually with books
if i can fill his mind with meaningless literature
lacking all depth and meaning and point, really
such a sport! thanks scott!
... no real point here really
trying to be creative and my juices aren't flowing
the only thing i've managed to create is a big mess on the kitchen table
good thing we don't sit down for dinner
what would i do without my microwave?
that provides me with instant home cooked meals in minutes?
we are a microwave generation
want everything right now
right away
without putting any real effort into it
just start it - walk away and
wish i could say the same about my degree....

*** I was on Academic Suspension for (what i thought was) failing Organic Chemistry. It's worth about a gazillion credits so i never thought anything of it. Had to go speak to the Dean. the DEAN!!! and chewed off all of my solar nails while waiting. He then tells me that i failed to drop my Freshman Composition course back in 1999 when i attempted 7 other hours but dropped them all for whatever reason. but i didn't drop English. guess what that means? an F! so now i have to retake it. despite the fact that i've taken it, Comp II, and a myriad other literature courses including women studies, Brit Lit, Western Lit, and god only knows what else... And now i will be in there with the FOB-by kids (wink, caroline) - that means "fresh off the boat" and have to write countless papers just to prove that i have what it takes. Do you think i can get independent study credit for maintaining this blog???

i think i've rambled enough
i don't even really know what i'm saying
or talking about
or not talking about for that matter...


white cj

this is going to be a strictly scrappin' post. (sorry guys) anyway, i AM ACCEPTING ANONYMOUS COMMENTS NOW! for those of you who don't do the whole bloggin' thang.

this is my Color Circle Journal. Please don't hate me because i chose white. the color means so much to me. anyway. i could go all deep and explain but you'd fall asleep. so here it is! i hope everyone has fun. April, you're first girl! this is the cover:

the sign in page is pretty self-explanatory. white is soooo hard to work with. please don't throw stuff at me... and don't call me boring either! "who chooses white?!"

my intro page. love those stamps that belong to amy that i'm thinking of just buying from her. or telling her SHE has them and must've lost them. (you can borrow mine whenever! bwahaha) the tag pages. there are actually four of these but how many times do you want me to post white pages with crackle paint?
my LO. i don't do the whole resolutions thing. so here are my promises...
had to use some black. sorry (but feel free to use beige, gold, whatever... just no COLOR!)
and this is at the back of the book. just a silly spot to fill the trapped white space and the empty pages.... just a chance for you to give me some color. or not. no pressure. if you don't want to do another LO... don't! tee hee!my LO for the revealing part... i'm really more interested to see what you think about life. i'll get this back and look at it daily. i already know what i think....

i absolutely love this pic of me. i look so guilty and innocent all at the same time. and the mirror chip! bwahahaha! love love love it.

thanks for looking. sorry if i bored the male readers....

toodles y'all!


gotta love the quickies!!!

i didn't realize until yesterday that i hadn't mentioned that i was going back to San Antonio on New Year's Day. A quick trip back "home" to get my college transcript from the University of Texas @ San Antonio. Before i proceed... NO they couldn't just mail it to me because it would've taken them forever. And i need it by the 9th. NO i couldn't get someone to pick it up for me and they could overnight it. NO! Plus i had a hold with UTSA because i was missing a transcript... ick, politics. 'Nuf of that! Just know that i HAD to go. (But i wasn't too terribly upset about it!)

First off, I live in Amarillo. A little podunk town in north Texas or "West Texas" as it's referred to. Even though i would consider El Paso to be more "west" than we are. Anyway, Brynne lives in Lubbock which is just 2 hours south of me.

Brynne and i met back in January-ish on the TC board on TwoPeas and i'm not sure why we started talking. But her life is rather interesting with her slew of men with their tongues wagging. After the thread started dying, brynne and i tried to keep it alive but pffffft. NADA! so, it no longer exists. Well, we kept talking through emails and then one day we exchanged phone numbers. We initially only talked every now and then. Then it became a "Thursday Thang." We scheduled our life around our thursday night conversations. Complete with brynne hiding in the bathroom on a date so she could talk to me for a second!!! Now we talk daily. Several times daily. And we'd never met. She's one of my good friends... and we've never met! So finally the day has come where i'll be driving through Lubbock and we decide to meet for lunch.

Funny story: (or maybe you had to be there) The waiter asks if everything is ok with our Fiesta Lime Chicken - which we both ordered - and i said i'd like more pico de gallo. He takes about 5 steps and brynne tells me i can have hers.

"Nevermind, I'll just eat hers!"
"Are you sure," says our waiter.
"Yes. It's cool, i'll just eat hers."
"wow, ok. You guys are easy."
"Well.... don't tell everybody!"
And brynne chokes on her Dr. Pepper... our waiter turns bright red. Then he starts stammering for god-only-knows what kind of response. "Well, i didn't mean... i mean, i don't know you two on that lev... er.... uhhhhh... Enjoy your meal!" Then we start cracking up!

It was nice to finally meet you. You're much prettier in person girlie!! And skinny too. Bitch! "You're not FAAAT!" See, and we thought we would have nothing to talk about.

Now, i'm off on the road again. And man, there are grass fires galore out there. I was afraid to toss my cigarette out the window for fear that i'd hear about a grass fire afterward and then my conscience would kill me. The first one i drove through created such a thick cloud of smoke that i could barely see the front of my car.

This one was right off the side of the road and created a big cloud of smoke as well. The fact that all the highway patrol cars and police were at the fires made it extremely easy to speed. So i shaved a few minutes (ok about 45) off of my trip into town!

As soon as i got there i headed to my heart. My kids. I miss them so much. Their parents made a really nice steak dinner. Then we went outside to play with silly string. They attacked me. Please don't ask me what's up with my hair. I won't know the answer... It was really good to see the kiddos. We opened presents and Laken BANKED on clothes, toys, and a gift card. And me?? WOOOOHOOO! I got the Best and the Worst of American Idol from the first four seasons. I can't wait to bust this out. I'm such an AI fanatic. Can't wait til this season starts!!!

These kids are so awesome. They hated that i left laken behind. but hey, 30 hour trip. 16 hours in a car. Nine month old baby?? No thanks!

The next day (which was just yesterday) i had to run around town to schools and pick up transcripts. I won't even start complaining about long lines, rude school staff, or lack of parking spaces. I won't go into detail that i cried because i miss San Antonio so much. But, that will mean about 7 days of crying now. I've just been waaaaaay to "not-busy" and things start running through my mind and crying just fits. bwahahaha! I did get to eat Thai Food and yummmmmy it was good.

me and bradley. we've been friends for about 6 years and now he's leaving me for Italy for four months. But he left his iTrip in my car so that kinda makes up for it. (i said kinda...)me and tina. we've been friends for about 5 years. good times. good times. she's crazy and i love her. Then i decided a trip to Scrapbook 911 was well in order. Here i am standing next to the new Basic Grey stand. and i'll give you one guess of the contents in the pink bag! I got Lucky, Fusion, and some other paper that i thought was cute. Around the Block. Never heard of 'em. but that's because the store here sucks ass. I would almost move back to San Antonio for this store!! And i was walking around thinking, "omg! i could so be an HOF-er if i could shop here more often."

There is my stuff. Love the new colors! So glad BG put out a new line. Now it won't hurt me so much to cut into my Blitzen! And see those stickers? Those are weight loss stickers. Cause i'm sick of being a fat ass. and i WILL lose weight! I'm not even going to label it as a resolution. This is a must. I CANNOT be fat anymore. "you're not faaaaaaaaaat!"

At one point (around 2pm) i realized that i had been away from Laken for waaaaay too long and got homesick. Don't get me wrong, i love SA and driving into town just felt right. I felt like i was at home. And i miss it. and i want to go back. and i walked around campus crying because i miss my memories and my friends. my "kids." Driving around in the crazy traffic. I miss my movie theaters. I miss it. all of it. BUT!!! i miss my son ten times more than that. And i wanted to be home.

So, in a nutshell, i drove out of Amarillo Sunday morning and was back home Monday night. It was a quickie. a short trip. but packed and full of friends and revisiting old memories. it was a short break from mommyhood and life and work and everything else. As i drove away i felt sad. sad to leave it again. all over again. it's weird that driving away from San Antonio felt so much like driving away from my life...

But now i'm back HOME!!!