Just As i Am...


it's me...

the owner of this blog. in case you've forgotten me!

so much is going on. going new. and here we go:

Made a new friend, Steve-ola. He's great. and please do not refer to him as a "nice guy," "such a nice guy" or any variation of the above with the word "nice" in it. Because we all know what happens to the nice guy. and he'll totally get frustrated about it... haha!

He's the only person that i *know* that i've given my blog address to. The rest of the world (minus a few close friends) know me exclusively through the internet. A few people from worked asked for the URL once and i was like ".....eh, that's kinda private. it's my diary"

So let me tell you about Steve. He's reading this right now, so you can all say "wassup!" I guess i've known him for about... this long. And then last friday i went out with some friends from work. He joined my friend Megan and then we all hung out. Well lemme just say that while i may not be the best dancer in the world... i can certainly move "my hump." So yes, i was out dancing with him and suddenly it hits me... **Chriselda, you're dancing dirty with someone you don't even know!!!** So i turn around and say, "OMG! I don't even know you and i'm dancing with you like this!" and he's so great... says "I'm STEVE!"

and for some reason that was sufficient for me so back to moving my lovely lady lumps. CHECK IT OUT!

So Steve reads this blog. He went clear back to the beginnning. Then proceeded to read my Pregnancy Diary. So now, we'll be driving down the street and i start telling a story and he's already "heard it" and it's so weird. He knows everything there is to know about me. My insecurities, the fact that coffee induces a morning bowel movement, that my BMs can and have made people two rooms over gag, he knows my fears, my worries, doubts... he knows me. So freaky weird. (but in a good way)

The one thing he didn't know or understand was Basic Grey. Kept asking why i would only want to use grey paper. he was so lost. poor fella. so today we spent the day together. Then i said, I must go to the scrapbook store. and we did.

oh how i did!

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

he says it took me about five seconds to clear the BG rack and he totally freaked out! said i looked like a crack fiend that just found a crack stand. I said... "I love basic grey" and he realizes that it's a brand and not a color. So he says to me "well, i guess now i know why you don't need Color Grey" and i couldn't help but laugh.

So here's to steve... my new friend who totally enabled my scrapbooking purchase today when i was $2 short. Here's to him because he saw how big my eyes got, and how close they were to popping out of my head when i saw the Hiedi Swapp stuff. Here's to him because instead of giving me the $2 i was lacking, he threw in some flower jewels and the Ghost Alphabet letters.

Here's to Steve... that "farthest-thing-from-being-nice-even-though-the-girls-at-the-LSS-totally-awwed-when-he-helped-me-shop" guy. The one who's reading my blogs and all about me because he can and is probably now blushing.

you're kick ass!


Turkey Day approaching...

it's almost bloody Thanksgiving. I'm sitting in the library at school. About to take off to Organic Chemistry. I love my life.... (note: serious sarcasm there). A girl just walked in talking to herself. She does this all the time. I see her in here twice a week and she's always talking to herself. Hey, I like talking to myself too! Mainly because I love talking to beautiful and intelligent people. (Note: serious vanity). LOL!!

anyway, one time last week, she actually talked to little ol' me.
she said, "i'm sorry... can you turn down your iPod?"
and i said, "i'm sorry. No."

and that was that. so maybe she's not talking to herself. maybe she's actually talking to me and cussing at me and all i hear is U2, or The Killers blowing in my ear.

speaking of my ear. I got hit in the ear today during volleyball. this girl with a flippin' strength in her hits spiked right to me and i though "i'm gonna die" and pfffft! there went my head! Just before that I had dived for the ball and i think i got about two feet of slide too! Got the missing skin from my elbow to prove it!

I have another one of *those* stories. But it will have to wait because... i said so!!!

in the mean time, i'd like to leave you with a little
Turkey Day Cheer!


oh, hmmmmmph.

first off, did you love my little audio post below? that was so much fun and will probably eliminate my need to type on this thing when i've got something stupid i need to bring to everyone's attention!

second... at Brynne-jamin's request... i have updated because she wants me to tell a story that, once again, can only happen to me.

So i had to join in on the whole dieting thing because if i'm not careful, people will start asking me how far along i am... and what am i having? So my friend and mostly partner in crime, Amy, went to the gym yesterday morning. i was running on the tread mill when i saw this hunky LL Cool J look alike and thought, man he looks familiar, and then BAM!!!! Fell off the treadmill! Caught myself on the railing but nonetheless totally made a spectacle of myself. Amy looks over, "WTF?" and my mom (who just happened to be at the gym at the same time) is there too. Turns out, that little hottie was my first love. My high school boyfriend.

Meet Ray. The first time i saw him i was walking out of my Economics class my sophomore year in high school, and effin' ran *right into the wall* - knocking myself flat on my ass and papers flew everywhere. He came over to help. I was embarrased. Then we were together. And i loved this guy. Lost myself to him (if you know what i mean) and will always love him. ALWAYS!

so moving back and knowing that he had moved back into town, gotten married, had children, and now works at some spectacular job made me nervous. Was i going to run into him? and if i did, was i going to shat myself? so i've been nervous. nervous that he and his white picket fence family would come into Olive Garden and i would be the chump waitress. explain that? nervous that the day would come where i would see him. And there it is. Yesterday morning at the gym as i was rounding one mile on the tread and pfffft! there he is in all his glory. i wanted to die. wanted to crawl under a rock. wanted to be skinnier most of all.

he's there with (who i am assuming is) his wife. she's cute. hmph. and i want to talk to him. want to talk to him and see if he ... i dunno. but i didn't. but somehow managed to walk in front of him and trip over absolutely nothing on the carpet! it was horrible and amy just shook her head.

so again i ask... How. and WHY? why me. i wasn't prepared for this. never could've been. but sheesh... did it have to be at the time when i am my most skankiest, stinky, self? i don't think he recognized me. don't think he even realized i burnt a whole in the back of his head from staring so much...

maybe one day he'll go to the gym alone and i can say hi. or just sit there... I all of a sudden feel very Harry from When Harry Met Sally when he says "in a city of 8 million people, you're bound to run into your ex." at least i wasn't singing Surry With a Fringe on Top. but i *did* fall off the treadmill. so, which is worse?


this is an audio post - click to play


dependant much???

I work for Xcel Energy - which covers 11 states worth of electricity. so if you have an outage... i'm bound to find out about it. Well, two weeks ago, Minnesota had 200,000 customers w/o power! All restored now but it took us about a week! So people get really upset when they have no electricity.

Got yelled at because a lady's kids couldn't watch Blues Clues. if i could reach through the phone and slap her for raising a child that's dependent on television for entertainment, i would've!

But sunday afternoon - Colorado starts getting snow. They get a foot and a half! And the Denver Metro region had about 65,000 customers w/o power. and i spoke to half of them too! they were all upset. it's freezing. my food is going to spoil. my phones don't work cause they're cordless. i can't open the garage because there's no power. can't even use my can opener because it's electric!!!

and i've been saddened with the dependency on electricity. yes, we need it but have we become THAT lazy that we don't even want to crank a can opener? don't want to play with our kids? go ape-shit because he's about to throw a fit if the tv doesn't come on???

i'm sad. sad that we don't read anymore. don't play games. that Playstations and computers have replaced bicycles and park slides.

sad that if the microwave goes out - we ain't eating dinner! sad that we don't know how to manually open a garage door. sad that we are so addicted to this drug that is electricity that we've allowed it to take over EVERY facet of our lives.

and i'm guilty too. don't know how i'd do my hair if i wasn't able to use my flat iron. would totally blow a gasket because i can't be on the computer. Would freak out if the battery on my iPod died and i wasn't able to recharge it.

but one thing's for sure. laken wouldn't be bored. we wouldn't starve. we wouldn't lose our minds because power is out for two hours. thinking back on my childhood and even young adulthood, those were the fun times. when we could escape it all and just BE with someone. just sit there and rely upon no outside forces for entertainment or to connect us to that person or the rest of the world. and we'd sit there and laugh. and figure it out.

and i want to return to that. so one day a month i'm going to totally minimize things and go back to being Basic. basic life. enjoy the things in life that are far more incredible than technology. like the fresh air. the color of leaves falling to the ground. just me. just laken. just my camera. and nothing else. no tv. no phones. no movies. no fully-cooked-just-microwave meals. just. just. just.

now, lemme get out my PalmPilot and schedule this day....

only to ME!!!

things that can only happen to me. My friend Amy told me that everyday i write the book ... and by that she means that life happens to me... it just does. and i can only sit back and say .... "did that REALLY just happen?" and "who does this happen to? WHO??" These are things that you see in movies - hear about in the embarrasing moments in Cosmo. But nothing like this ever happens to anyone... but ME!

so here goes:

***last night i had a conversation on instant messenger for a little over 30 minutes with my friend Michael. His msgr was acting up and he couldn't see the names of his buddies. so he asks "who is this?" and i make him guess. he's asking me questions - asking for hints... and we do this for 30 minutes. and he NEVER guesses. so i start telling him how much i know of him (hoping it will clue him in) and then he says he has to go work out. i said "take your phone, i'll call you" So i wait a couple of minutes... then call him "Michael you b-hole!" and he's confused - totally baffled "why are you calling me names?" At this point, i realize i had just had a conversation with someone named michael and it wasn't HIM!!! So that other shmuck was waiting for a phone call and never got one. and i feel like a total arse!

*** I was being nice. Sent Jessica an itunes gift card... and this is what i got for a
THANK YOU!! scroll to just below the banner. No ma'am you may NOT give this away! and Amy is on the phone laughing her ass off. Wants to know how *she* can win it from her!!! I love you girl. glad you got this straightened out...

*** and just as normal - i have *once again* put my panties on wrong. i told a friend this the other day and tried to explain that this happens at least once a week. i think she thinks i'm weird. so someone please tell me i'm not the only one. They're inside out, or i've put my waist through the leg hole....

*** i stayed up studying for my first Organic Chemistry test the other night. didn't sleep a wink Sunday night. Worked from 630-3 yesterday and then took my test last night. and failed it. drew a total blank. couldn't even answer the simplest of simplest questions. "what is an ionic bond?" ... uhhhhh. dunno. so much for that sexy brain, huh missy??

*** i went to open my pack of animal crackers from the vending machine (even though i'm dieting) and when i pulled the bag open - my ONE DOLLAR bag - the cookies/crackers flew everywhere and into puddles of mud and water. I suppose that's what i get for trying to cheat on my diet and for walking throught the school lawns and not on the sidewalks.

*** i have a crush. have had one for the last two months on this guy at work that reads electric meters. He walks by my desk at least a million times a day (cause i'm right by the door). He's a cutie. And yesterday morning i was complaining to two coworkers who know about my thing for him - that he NEVER talks to me. Never even makes eye contact with me. I've talked to one of the other guys he works with (ok, ALL the meter readers) and he says "he's shy" and well, i know this is hard to believe - but when it comes to someone i actually like - so am i. So there i was... complaining and just as i finish, he rounds the corner. he's walking by my desk... and looks right at me, "Good morning. How are you doing?" and i swear - i had a total deer-in-the-headlights expression. managed to says "fine" or "sure" or something... and then immediate bent down to TIE MY SHOE!!!!! wtf?! it was such a "I carried a watermelon??" moment. and then the girls just laughed at me.

Such is a day in my life. just a bunch of nonsense. hence the title of this blog INSANITY here... it's all insanity.

Have Laken's doctro's appt this afternoon and his dad wants to go. Hmm. having daddy around is so foreign to me... and that in itself, is sad!


random me...

i've had a crazy weekend. including:
-a run in with baby daddy. our mutual friend was celebrating her birthday and he was there. we danced alot. had some chic grab me by the arm, look me up and down, and ask "you're ray's baby momma??" and i'm thinking, i'm about to smack this bitch up!
-getting into an argument with my, now, *EX* and his "ex" girlfriend who i happen to work with at Olive Garden... (what a tangled web we weave)
-finding out my new ex just got fired from his job! (although, i'm not too upset about that one)
-spending hours on the phone with the tech support for iPod. why is it that i'm the only one of us that is having difficulties? it just randomly deleted 800+ songs. Three days after calling iPod and listening to them tell me that they don't know what happened, "Thanks for calling" - my genius mind has figured it out. and i'm back.... in the saddle again!

but the good:
- i got my new ring from James Avery to add to my growing collection.
- i just put Gwen in my pod... and on my video Code. i kinda always knew i'd end up his ex girlfriend.
-i went to the LSS and bought myself a shload of stuff that i absolutely didn't need. but i made up for it with a shopping spree at Target to balance my splurges with Laken's splurges. (he got new blocks, bowls, bibs, shoes, and some other little goodies (mainly new foods to try). Having this little boy is such a blessing!)

things i don't understand:
- how the scrapbook store has managed to run out of Basic Grey. and then i realized that all the stuff that Missy comes up with is to blame for the shortage of paper. So i ask, could you spare me some BG? my friend amy says to me "you're probably the reason they're out here in the first place!" and i look at my little collection, and think "maybe!"
-organic chemisty. nuf said.
-why i am so humored by the fact that the new free iTunes for this week is a song called "high" by James Blunt. is that irony???
-why my friend amy (who's iPod i linked to mine to triple my library) has every song the Beatles ever sang????

horrible things:
- my mom picked laken up for me yesterday since my work schedule has changed to 7pm. and she forgot to bring MY car seat home with her. woke up this morning to get him in the car. no seat. and where's hers??? in her car... at her job! ack. What do you do? i HAD to get into town. so i put laken between two pillows in the front seat of my car with me and prayed that the back roads into town wouldn't be populated by potential road kill. so glad he's there safe now...
-i have an organic chemistry test next monday and my super job won't let me off for it without an occurence. well, peace love and chicken grease, this job will NOT come before my test. no way. no how!
- my little cousin Megan wrecked her new camaro. she's distraught. (man i love that word). she's a senior this year. was driving down the road and some jackhole drove in front of her. she swerved to miss hitting him, but almost hit a pedestrian so she swerved the other way, then drove her car into a fence. TOTALED her car. worse than that?? since she didn't actually *hit* the other guy, even though he was ticketed, she can't get his insurance to pay for it. She only has liability on her car since it was paid off...
- i played volleyball in junior high/high school/ occasionally since then. and hated to be SETTER. hate it. i would always jam my fingers. one of them is still jammed from an 8th grade incident. i can't pop that finger or bend it very well. Anyway... i tell my instructor today (during our game) "I don't want to be setter" and she puts me there anyway. so i bump set the entire time and then at one point, my stupid self decides i can set. so i do. and... my thumb is now jammed and black and bruised.
-i'm here... updating my blog when i should really be doing school work. so off i go. and i promise my birthday pics will make it up here soon.